Saturday, March 19, 2005

Sunset Monologue 17

Inside the Witches Coven

That's What Friends Are For!

Hmmm, why would black women get together to socialize with one another? Remember, we do nothing but be catty, backstab and try to steal each others man..or so they say. Well I beg to differ. That subset of our group is just that; a subset. Sistas get together to catchup, bond and yes I'm going cliche' Exhale.

Friday nite was that nite for me and my crew. Now we go all out and do sleepovers (insert male fantasy here). Packing is the bare essentials: Nite clothes, toiletries and whatever you are contributing to the party. We have toothbrushes etc. already out to the house, so it's just throw some clothes in a bag and hit the road.

Now the trip to my girlfriends is an adventure in itself. See here in Georgia things are just sometimes different. Distance is relative. People talk alot about Atlanta, but you must remember Atlanta to some means the ENTIRE STATE!! Atlanta is a CITY in the STATE and in reality alot of us don't even live in Atlanta, lol To drive 20-40 minutes to get to someone's house is considered "down the street". It takes me 35 minutes to get to my girlfriends house. It's a ride thru hell because she lives in a one horse town where the speed limit goes 45,35,30,45. WTH?! I know it well and can drive it perfectly (I have had an $105 speeding ticket for going 50 in the 30mph zone - which happens to be in FRONT of the police station - ouch).

Totally stressed out, I arrive at another one of my favorite Georgia jokes; the sub-division. The sub-division is a take on the Edward Sissorhands way of living, same house different color, all bundled together in a community. I still don't know WHAT it is a sub-division of, lol The trick is that every street within the sub-division is the name of the subdivision with suffixes. For instance if you live in say Creekside. Then the streets are named "Creekside Way" "Creekside Drive" "Creekside Street" - now how's that for insanity? So first I have to drive with more control than a racecar driver and then decipher a maze of same name streets (I can do the Peachtrees better) and FINALLY I arrive at my destination.

As we file in, putting our bags in oru respective sleep spots. Most of us head straight for...the kitchen to get a DRINK. Drinking is a favorite pastime at our get togethers. The drink of choice last nite Watermelon, Vodka Martini's. Do we have a recipe? Hell no! Do we care? Hell no!

Now comes the fun part - - we sit around and do absolutely NOTHING. Quite to probably alot of people's surprise; we don't spend alot of time talking about men. Hell those of us that got one don't want to jinx it and those of us that don't - why mess up a good evening? We dibble and dabble in all kind of conversation. My contribution is always about popular culture and things of the entertainment sort.

Friday nite - we sat and watched that comedy "America's Next Top Model" and booked us an all inclusive ticket to hell, as we watched that gal fall clean out on the floor. You can't buy that kinda comedy.

There's usually (based on how many drinks) musical interludes where we'll dance or sing or both. Sometimes we'll have a guest of honor. The lucky one that night: WILL SMITH. A copy of "I robot" appeared and an half hour was spent looking at the first 15 minutes - gotta LOVE Tivo!

THEN some harsh reality begins to set in - we are no longer in our twenties, lol I am usually the first to go. I am the joke at most of these gatherings because I'll just conk out sometimes mid-sentence and always in an upright position. Soon we'll all begin to think about our jobs, kids, hassles etc. and the weight of the world creeps in and only sleep will cure that madness. So we all say goodnite and basically CRASH.

So if you thought that there would be X-rated toy parties or Kama Sutra demonstrations - - sorry, maybe at some gal get togethers, but not at mine. Nevertheless, I always come home refreshed and revived after I step out the Witches Coven.

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Television Guilty Pleasures

"I will NOT stop till all the Cheaters in Dallas are exposed!"


You know one of the best things about television is that you can find just about some of everything. Well my guilty pleasure is (and you know you watch) Cheaters. Lord have mercy! Based in Dallas and hosted by Joey Grieco - this show takes you on a journey among the cheating. Some poor soul feels that their 6 month relationship is just not like it used to be, so they hire cheaters to track their wayward lover and then the tape is brought back to be shown to them, usually in the middle of the nite and then courtesy of Joey - you get to go confront your cheating lover. Now if THAT is not TV at it's best; I don't know what is. You sit with anticipation as the host drags you thru the persons infidelity with words like "they obviously thought you were a sucka as evidenced in this taped conversation" and then you sit on the edge of your seat during the confrontation as they cuss and fight and if they DON'T you best believe Joey will remind you that you all need to be pissed off and someone should PAY for their skanky behavior,lol lol

Check your local listings for this show! You won't be disappointed.
Posted by Pamalicious :: 10:37 PM :: 0 comments

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