ThE EmAnCiPaTiOn oF pAmMiE

Friday, December 02, 2005

Sunset Monologue 123

No Shame in My Game

Blog Musical Mood: Run It - Chris Brown

I shivered gleefully as I hugged the ATM machine this morning - I was so tired of it humming to me "We Don't Mess Wit No Broke Niggas" Leave that to Kanye' why don't cha!

I didn't know you don't really need your hearing to drive - as I listen to my MP3 player in the car in the mornings,lol. What's up people?! It's a crisp Friday nite; the ending to a pretty good work week. Decatur was ALIVE to the sound of pay checks and welfare cards this evening. Traffic was a mess starting at like 3:45pm when I got off work until I finally got home around 7:30pm. I had that payday running around to do - pay some folks to keep from getting in a fist fight, pick up my meds and stop thru the Wing Shop to get some Fish Hoagies. I really wish we would stop 'taking it out' on the Asians. It's old and tired right about now. The Wing Shop stood empty for like six months and then when they came in and opened it and what not - NOW 'we' standing up in there complaining and just making life difficult. Negro you didn't do anything with the spot! So you bitchin about you want all flats looks damn foolish. Give it a rest and open up something that YOU can be the boss of.

I had to stop thru the Thrift Store because although I bought pants, I don't have alot of cooler weather tops. I wanted to pick up some light sweaters etc. As I laid out the evenings plans to Mini-me she got this 'look' on her face. I questioned as to what was wrong and she started mumbling about can we go tomorrow because it was still daylight out and people would see her. It took me a minute to register what she said and I dismissed it. I kept on talking, then she kept on mumbling and WHOOSH! I went off.

I don't know about other parents, but I like to give mine a dose of reality. I don't give a constipated rat's ass - who or what sees me at the Thrift Store! I am not ashamed to shop there. When she makes some money, she can do with it what she pleases but until then...I was not even purchasing her anything there, but if I was I still don't give a damn. I work damn hard to provide for her and I'm not concerned about anyone else's perception. She dresses quite appropriate for a 12 year old and in no way looks like she's homeless, which should be her ONLY concern.

I understand all about peer pressure etc., but and I know we all do it differently, if a child is tripping over name brands and stores etc. etc. then that's the parents psychosis not theirs. Mini-Me had on a pair of South Pole Jeans, a Gap Sweater and some of those Sherpa boots today - she got alot of NERVE trying to be embarrassed.

I have had 87 cents all damn week in the bank - I was not saying that for effect; I get paid today and did I turn my cell phone back on? NO, Did I pay the carnote? NO, I bought a fucking $200 ticket for her to fly to be with her cousins over winter break! I then take my ass to the Thrift Store so that I can do for her.

We have seen a couple of kids moms at the thrift, because you do what you have to in order to keep your family running. I don't care and am not concerned if other parents are under the illusion that 'expensive' equals LOVE. Sacrifice equals love to me and that's what I do alot of the time in all areas of my life. I am not a slob, nor am I a fuddy duddy and so where I shop should be of no consequence to anyone. Least of all some children.

Just cause some whiteman who is pimping some Indians and Cambodians says that this will make you whatever lie he tells, does not mean I now need to run right out and buy it. If you are warm, fashionable (which has nothing to do with trendy), and carrying yourself well, it shouldn't matter WHERE it came from.

I know that at some point, I'm going to have to be sensitive to some things because peer pressure is a bitch and I am sensitive - but don't go acting like you are ASHAMED of what I do to make sure we are really not ASS OUT!

Shit, I like so-called nice things as well, do I really want to buy my panties from the Walmart - not all the time - a sista wants some Vicky's but I'm not going to be rocked to sleep into believing that Vikki's (who has no name shit at Target) is 'better' just because the word Vikki's is on it.

I want to teach her and instill in her, do it because it's a choice among others and NOT because it holds some kinda 'value' LAND, GOLD, DIAMONDS are worthy investments - ROCAWEAR, BABY PHAT AND NIKE....ARE....NOT!

She sat there stunned - because sometimes kids forget as they go about their day, waking up in a warm house to hot oatmeal after they turn on the lights, get out their clothes to be ironed and go cut on hot water, get dressed and brush their beauty parlored done up hair while listening to the radio, putting on a warm coat w/matching gloves and hats after grabbing their MP3 player and money off the matching living room set and getting into a well running automobile and being escorted to a before care service that then takes them to a good school where their gainfully employed mother comes and picks them up as they sit in their friends moms warm car so they won't be cold till I get there so we can go and get lip gloss and fish sandwiches that you eat while watching cable in your room - WHAT THE DEAL IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alrightyyy, It is Friday so I'll lightened it up a bit, lol lol but ya'll know ain't nothing worse than your child hurting your feelings.

Meme Time, lol Peeped this over on The Unconquerable Soul's Page and so here yah go:


First job: Day Care Assistant at a Nursery - I got paid $30 a week,lol I was 15
First screen name: Pammie
First funeral: My Father in 88
First pet: Bosco the German Shepard that got run over because we did NOTHING to train it. After that we had a series of Fish all named Fred. One year we had a chicken named Baby.
First piercing: First set of holes in my ears
First tattoo: Don't Have Any
First credit card: Lerners now NY & Co.
First kiss: Tony
First enemy: Penny down the block


Last car ride: 7:30 this evening home from the Wing Spot
Last kiss: July I think
Last movie watched: Holes
Last beverage drank: Barq's Diet Root Beer
Last phone call: Left a message for Janet
Last time showered: Last Nite
Last CD played: Eric Benet's Hurricane - ditched them all for the MP3


Last website visited:
Single or taken: Single but emotionally strung out
Gender: Female
Birthday: June 4th
Sign: Gemini (yea that explains it)
Siblings: 7 Brothers and 6 Sisters
Hair color: Dark Brown splashed in some shade of blonde
Eye color: Dark brown.
Wearing: Jeans, a lime green sweater, mis matched socks, pink bra and panties both cotton
Drinking: about to get some water
Thinking about: Nothing in particular
Listening to: Yahoo Radio 1990's R&B Station - You Don't Have To Worry/New Edition

Ya'll have a good one - I'll be back on Sunday and before I go, I just wanted to post a picture of a Brotha (I'm not going to get in my politics about this one) that during the time this picture was taken - shole nuff scared some Keeblers and Negroes alike, lol lol (I would Love to pick out that fro)....Tookie...I hope it works out for yah!

Posted by Pamalicious :: 8:40 PM :: 5 comments

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